(oh ha sorry guys I was out for a bit GASP WHEEZE how did I survive this long without my computer)
I’m sortof simultaneously fascinated by and embarrassed of my kenophobia, which is a phobia of voids. Which for me only happens in videogames! Like, the sky irl, I know there’s stars out there even if they’re a bajillion miles away. Or the ocean, I know there’s a floor eventually. There’s something.
But videogames, especially if you’re on the edge of a level or a glitched out hole and look down, the view legit horrifies me. I feel that turbulence in an airplane feeling in my gut if I’m near the edge, god help me if I fall I’ll ball up in real life because it feels like spikes just shot up into my feet. The same feeling, perhaps even worse happens if there’s a body of water that doesn’t have a visible bottom. Water with fog, oh fuck, I’m not going in, nope nope noooope fuck you fuck this fuck no.
Thankfully nothing in the real world does it for me. Logically there’s stars out there, logically there’s a bottom of the ocean where the earth is, but game spaces can break that logic failsafe because there really is just… nothing. At all. Forever.
It doesn’t help that you could hide all manner of fantastical monsters the size of godzilla down in that abyss. I have nightmares about playing a game and there’s secretly a huge eyeball watching me, or I’m forced to swim somewhere and a huge monster swallows me up. Or I just fall forever.
Pretty sure there’s quite a few stories my friends/SO could tell of me skyping with them and screaming and whining and bawing about a void or being underwater.
…anyway yeah I feel really stupid and people have made fun of me for being afraid of fake things. And praise Bioshock for having land on their skybox because it makes this feeling vanish entirely.